Smarked for Death – WWE Superstars 5/19/11.

WWE would like to announce that their Thursday show will now be called Superstars Wrestling.  Here we go with some rare wrestling action.

Tyson Kidd (with Michael Hayes) vs. Yoshi Tatsu.

Red hat guy is front row!  I haven’t seen him in forever, or so it feels.  Maybe he’s been sitting opposite hard camera side lately.  Hayes says its been awhile since he’s been in this city.  I’m guessing he means in front of the fans.  Purely Sexy himself is still gold on the mic.  He’s turned the fans who moments ago cheered him, into his worst enemies.  The match finally begins and Tyson takes the heel advantage from the start.  Yoshi’s tights look like he found them in the back of Ricky Steamboat’s closest.  Kidd is doing a stunning job and every week I feel that Tyson is one of the best pure wrestlers in WWE.  Tatsu finally strings some moves together and knocks Kidd down to the outside of the ring.  Hayes circles the outside, trying to interfere in any way possible.  Michael Hayes shows that not only does he still have the speaking skills that put others to shame, but the dancing ones as well.  The leader of the Freebirds moonwalks his way across the ring.  It must have worked because Kidd illegally uses the ropes like a Smooth Criminal.  For a contest that’s on the “lesser” show these two wrestlers are putting on a Thriller of a match.  Kidd tries to put Yoshi down for a count of three but Tatsu Beat It.  All of the children in the audience are cheering for the face comeback from Yoshi.  In upcoming weeks Tatsu should team with Hornswoggle while they both wear John Cena t-shirts.  Throw all the things kids love together into one gimmick.  Maybe they can wear masks too.  Tyson starts to get cocky and he gets a running start right into a drop toe hold that drops Kidd’s face into the turnbuckle.  Yoshi almost picks up the win and Hayes freaks out like his meal at the Waffle House depends on Kidd winning.  Tyson is the perpetrator of a perfect looking super-plex.  This match should be over yet again but Yoshi makes his way to a rope break.  Yoshi and Tyson exchange two counts while we all think this match will go a few more minutes.  Until Tatsu’s foot picks up an obscene amount of speed before connecting with Tyson’s temple.  Yoshi Tatsu gets the pin and Tyson Kidd gets one pissed off Freebird.  Michael Hayes helps up his charge, only to punch Tyson back down.  Is this the end of the partnership or tough love?  Superstars becomes something exciting to tune into next week.

Santino Marella and Vladimir Kozlov vs. Zack Ryder and Curt Hawkins

The Major Broskis are back!  Zack and Curt were better known as the fake Edges from years ago.  Neither man has found something that clicked in the years since, until Ryder and YouTube united in love.  Vlad doesn’t look like he’s wearing the proper gear.  Blue tights and boots, red pads.  Maybe he’s the brand new all American Russian.  Scott Stanford calls it the “battle of two former tag teams”.  While the Major Brothers have reunited for this match, weren’t Santino and Vladimir still a team?  Zack and Curt are damn good together.  Both men are aggressive, innovative, and showy.  They never forget this is about the fans in the arena AND the ones at home. Santino is so over that he gets the hot tag over the bigger, stronger Kozlov.  Santino hits the Cobra on Curt Hawkins and we have to wait one more week for the Zack Ryder push to start.

Evan Bourne vs. Drew McIntyre

The crowd pops for Drew’s music.  While it is a fucking awesome entrance theme, the fact is Drew has been a heel his entire WWE career.  As McIntyre enters the arena the crowd boos.  This is a strange strange group of fans.  Yay, we love your song but hate your face!  Evan goes for the high flying and Drew keeps his composure, never letting Bourne’s assault get the better of him.  Evan starts to gain momentum but the seemingly weakened Drew fools us all and knocks Evan down on his neck outside of the ring.  Evan escapes a suplex by running his knees into Drew’s head.  McIntyre responds with a massive kick to the face.  Drew picks up Evan for a hesitation suplex off the top rope.  For someone who doesn’t look to be that strong, this was a hell of an impressive move out of the Scotsman.  Scott Stanford calls the wrestlers David and Goliath.  With legit giants in the company there is no need to call Drew a goliath.  Drew attempts the recent popular move of running an opponent into the post but Evan reverses it and drops Drew’s body onto the steps.  One of the cameramen earns a bonus for recording from the turnbuckle as Evan drives his feet into McIntyre’s face.  Everything tells me that Evan will now win this match but Drew brings that talent that won him the Intercontinental championship out of mothballs and hits the Future Shock DDT for the pin.

Great work by Drew and hopefully his career starts to come back.  As always, fantastic wrestling on Superstars.

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