Bad Speller gets Arrested
Sasha Grey Gives her Butt for charity
Welcome to the Weird News where once upon a wicked weekday we wonder wisping willows of the wacky.
Quick shot out to my main writer Roger, I still hate you.
This just in Bad spellers are being arrested, thieves strike sex stores and Sasha Grey takes it in the pooper to make kids super.
Beware bad spellers; the cops are coming for you!
In Vermont Brittany Speckman woke on morning to find her car had been vandalized, the plate was bent and scratched in to the hood was the word SLUT.. or rather S-U-L-T
Speckman pointed out Adam Hall as a potential suspect and police asked him to write “you are a slut” to which he wrote “you are a sult”. He was immediately arrested but was quoted as saying “I’ll be ok, cause Dog’s got my back.” And “When life hands you melons you make melonaid”
We consulted with a local psychiatric expert who said he believes this all stems from Halls repeated Christmas letters to Satan
There’s no butt’s about Sasha Grey has gone from adult entertainment to children’s educations.
Adult film starlet Sasha Grey, left the adult industry last April, but her films are still “coming” out. (huh huh?)
Grey, now a mother, has turned her attentions to doing more charitable work focused on children’s literacy. She recently was a celebrity guest reader at Emerson Elementary School in Compton, California.
And her charity continues as one of her scenes will be featured in the soon to be released Anal Artists. Grey has released a statement that Ascension Films will donate a portion of the film’s proceeds to the National Education Association’s Read Across America program.
According to the Huffington Post, NEA officials have responded with a “No Thanks”, cause apparently they already have something way bigger up their butts.
In an unrelated story a RASH of robberies have hit sex shops across the country. Iowa city police reported a man stealing a $250 “mega masturbator” sex toy. The man apparently held a hunting knife to an employee and then grabbed the “Fuck me Silly” Model of the doll, which is described as “sounding and feeling just like a real ass!”… Sounding? I’m gonna leave that one alone. Police however aren’t,
CrimeStoppers is offering an award of up to $1,000 for tips leading to the thief’s arrest. And just the Tip.
Talk about a Hardened criminal.
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