#HashtagHorror Pet Semetary

REGALSAYS: I think I saw this years ago and it so bad I subconsciously vowed never to watch it again. 

But the magic of Hashtag Horror allows me to give it a ‘FUCK YOU’ rating and hoping that’s the last time I see it. 

FamousPlewaI have been ousted as host tonight *slowly plots scheme to regain that title* #HashtagHorror

Kristoffrable Ah welcome to Stephen King’s horror: misspelling! #HashtagHorror

Kristoffrable “Bye old Shep, see you in heaven yep?” Really, that’s by rhyming.#HashtagHorror

TheSupremeForce #HashtagHorror Tonight I find out whether rewatching a bad movie is better or worse than suffering through it the first time.

FamousPlewa Sure was a lot of pets in this town. Enough to give Sheldon Cooper the fear #HashtagHorror

Kristoffrable Was that dog named Biffer? And if so, was it Biff Tanens?#HashtagHorror

TheSupremeForce#HashtagHorror That music was the best part of this movie.

Kristoffrable That was the most haphazardly, deadly semetary (damn you Stephen King) I’ve ever seen. #HashtagHorror

FamousPlewa#HashtagHorror I’ll bet that cat is happy after travelling in the car all that time

FamousPlewa#HashtagHorror oh it’s him! One of The Munsters ain’t it?

TheSupremeForce#HashtagHorror The perfect place for small children to live: between an evil cemetery and a truck drag racing track.

FamousPlewa#HashtagHorror Cats in bed at that age? Must be a young@SolaceWinter

Kristoffrable Was the old man lighting a spliff there? #HashtagHorror

Kristoffrable Your cat helped win the second world war? He’s a fucking hero; I own his books! #HashtagHorror

Kristoffrable So, why does Missy talk like Boomhauer? #HashtagHorror

Kristoffrable That goldfish shouldn’t have been playing in the road. #HashtagHorror

Kristoffrable Oh man, if @JoeBewick were watching this, he would cry over the graves of all those dead dogs. #HashtagHorror

Kristoffrable Child bitching about God not having a cat. This movie is such a classic! #HashtagHorror

Kristoffrable Poor child, she doesn’t even realize that she’s a hipster wearing those glasses. #HashtagHorror

Kristoffrable I think that belly ache is giving me a belly ache, you creepy crazy bitch! #HashtagHorror

FamousPlewa#HashtagHorror Fuck happened to her?

Kristoffrable Cuz, you know, dead guys always talk to me, when, you know, they’re dead. #HashtagHorror

FamousPlewa#HashtagHorror it IS customary to follow dead people into a Sematary

Kristoffrable I certainly pick up dead cats without wearing gloves, on the side of the road, all the time. #HashtagHorror

FamousPlewa#HashtagHorror what is with that red cap? He steal it from Fred Durst?

FamousPlewa#HashtagHorror Took him till nightfall to dig a three foot hole?

Kristoffrable Fun fact, this is the one work of Stephen King where he admitted taking it too far. #HashtagHorror

TheSupremeForce#HashtagHorror The neighbor is the creepiest part of this movie.

Kristoffrable Fuck yeah, raking leaves in my leather jacket like a terrible 80′s music video, getting scared by cat, I’m still cool. #HashtagHorror

Kristoffrable You know, with this book/film, it’s 300 or so years later and they’re still blaming the Native Americans. #HashtagHorror

Kristoffrable Damn, was there ever a time that Munster guy wasn’t tall, like, even in his flashbacks? #HashtagHorror

Kristoffrable Though, I’ll tell you, I’ll head over to the old man’s house more often, he’s good for a Bud. #ThisBudsForYou #HashtagHorror

Kristoffrable Take a shower, pussy! Shut Up, Mathews. I don’t care how much I like Are You Serious? #HashtagHorror

Kristoffrable Splish splash I was taking a bath, all upon when my cat came in with a dead rat! #HashtagHorror

Kristoffrable Shut up, it works. #HashtagHorror

Kristoffrable I’m still waiting for that movie where they sacrifice those annoying children from all these horror movies in it. #HashtagHorror

TheSupremeForce#HashtagHorror Guy couldn’t even let the cat thank him for bringing it back from the dead.

Kristoffrable Hang yourself lady? That is so cliche. #HashtagHorror

Kristoffrable So, was that a primitive crop circle? #HashtagHorror

FamousPlewa#HashtagHorror that’s Stephen King there ain’t it?

Kristoffrable Stan Lee is the Stephen King of his movie cameos. Learned from the fucking master! #HashtagHorror

Kristoffrable Why does the mom have 80′s guys hair? It just looks so wrong.#HashtagHorror

FamousPlewa#HashtagHorror Aw FUCK this movie now I remember this piece of shit movie.

Kristoffrable Is he transporting French gasoline? #HashtagHorror

TheSupremeForce#HashtagHorror This movie is anti Native Americans AND anti truck drivers.

Kristoffrable I like how she keeps yelling get the baby, when he knows what he needs to do. Go back to the 80′s lady. #HashtagHorror

TheSupremeForce#HashtagHorror It’s also anti-parents because they also suck. Possible that it’s anti-elderly, as well.

Kristoffrable Nothing like getting in a fight…in a church…and knocking the casket ov…this is just bad. #HashtagHorror

FamousPlewa#HashtagHorror even WWE wouldn’t have a punch up at a funeral.

Kristoffrable Stephen King = Over. This movie, does not. #HashtagHorror

TheSupremeForce#HashtagHorror An Abomination. The question: What is this movie?

Kristoffrable Got to love their explanation for the burial ground. “The ground went sour.” So it reached it’s expiration date? #HashtagHorror

Kristoffrable You should be scared kid…at how bad this movie is. #HashtagHorror

TheSupremeForce#HashtagHorror That guy is the worst “swearer” in movie history.

TheSupremeForce#HashtagHorror She continues to be a terrible mother even right after her other kid died.

FamousPlewa#HashtagHorror Security must be non existent at normal semetary

Kristoffrable Is that cop driving on the graves themselves? #HashtagHorror

Kristoffrable“I bench press child coffins by day!” – Bad father digging up his son and putting him in an ancient burial ground. #HashtagHorror

TheSupremeForce#HashtagHorror We should have rewatched Trollhunter.

Kristoffrable I wasted pizza rolls on this piece of shit…fuck you Pet Semetary, you and your bad spelling! #HashtagHorror

Kristoffrable You hug that corpse dude, like a fucking boss. #HashtagHorror

TheSupremeForce#HashtagHorror This is how zombie apocalypses start.

Kristoffrable “When I just finish burying my son in an ancient Indian burial ground, I like to drop dead on my bed.” – Bad father. #HashtagHorror

FamousPlewa#HashtagHorror load the shotgun, old man. We got us some introodas up in here.

TheSupremeForce#HashtagHorror Old guy was a total jobber.

Kristoffrable I’m pretty sure that wounds like that couldn’t kill you that quickly.#HashtagHorror

Kristoffrable And seriously, you’re like 6’3″ tall, stomp the little fucker!#HashtagHorror

TheSupremeForce#HashtagHorror These parents deserved to die, so there’s that, at least.

Kristoffrable So, when you get buried in a pet semetary, you turn into the mad hatter apparently. #HashtagHorror

FamousPlewa#HashtagHorror misleading footprints. Clever little fucker

Kristoffrable Zombies know how to use phones…good to know. #HashtagHorror

Kristoffrable I like how the father sets a good example of waiting for the truck to pass by before crossing. Too late fuck stick. #HashtagHorror

Kristoffrable Sure, now he uses the gloves…worst doctor ever. #HashtagHorror

TheSupremeForce#HashtagHorror Killing the same cat twice is unforgivable.

FamousPlewa#HashtagHorror if this had to be remade… Who would be the dirt worse actor/actress that they would find for it?

Kristoffrable So, did this kid go to school of badly cliched horror moves, because I think he did. #HashtagHorror

TheSupremeForce#HashtagHorror Hey, look. Blading.

TheSupremeForce#HashtagHorror You can’t bury her in the pet cemetery only wearing ONE shoe!!!

Kristoffrable “Mistakes are not possible.” – Bad father/Bad Husband#HashtagHorror

Kristoffrable Talk about a walk of shame. #HashtagHorror

FamousPlewa#HashtagHorror this movie is fucked up.

Kristoffrable Moral of this film: Bad fathers and bad husbands make bad movies with bad zombies and misspellings! Fuck this movie! #HashtagHorror

Kristoffrable Why did Stephen King have an assistant on this movie, he was in it for less than 30 seconds. #HashtagHorror

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One comment on “#HashtagHorror Pet Semetary

  1. Pingback: #HashtagHorror Schedule for August 2012 « Team Hellions

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