Justin Gabriel vs. Heath Slater (AGAIN?!). Gabriel wins.
Yoshi Tatsu vs. Johnny Curits. Yoshi wins.
Justin Gabriel vs. Heath Slater (AGAIN?!). Gabriel wins.
Yoshi Tatsu vs. Johnny Curits. Yoshi wins.
Much like last issue, the third page is where I lose my stuff over the amazing writing in this book. ”Its a race to CRASHING IN THE OCEAN!” Its a race for me to finish these pages!
Team Robo (I apologize for not knowing everyone’s name yet. Rest assured I will be buying every previous series of this comic in the near future.) manages to catch their leader falling from the sky. I’m trying so hard to not give spoilers on any of this but, hey, bad things happen to heroes and they become heroes when we see how they rise above these challenges. Robo got knocked down, and it was up to his team to save him so he can be brought back.
Last issue I wondered why Robo had such a team when he seemed to be very self sufficient. No, he did not think of the great idea that saved the day. But he probably could have. In my mind, Atomic Robo has no limitations. He is awesome and the only possible limitations within that metal body is selflessness. Robo will save the day, or die trying.
The Atomic Robo comes back, better than ever before and just in time a first call with NASA. (Not his first call ever, but for the sake of this series lets say it is.) But wait, you might say, didn’t he talk to NASA in the last issue and thus that was the whole reason for his rescue mission? Yes and no! There is a mystery afoot and by issue two it already involves all of Earth and space.
Can someone tell me who these two scientists are that sit and drink coffee and try to figure out where missing buildings go? Gah! They’re amazing! I have never had two characters on a page become so interesting so fast. I would listen to a podcast of these two talking about anything right this second.
Also, I’m horrible about crediting good artists. I’ll go into more depth here soon enough but there is one specific scene I want to mention from this book. On page 4 (of story) Atomic Robo has a slight break in his body and the small sound “krikt” appears. Its small, it will be bad, but maybe not too bad. Then in the next panel there is the much much larger “KRAKT”. This is now my sound for bad things happening. Really bad things of immense scale.
KRAKT.
From Red 5 Comics, Brian Clevinger, and Scott Wegener.
“You can contribute or you can leave.”
This is the first issue of Atomic Robo I have ever read. I was lost, confused, and at times I didn’t have a clue who was on the page or what was their purpose in the overall story. And I loved every single panel.
Atomic Robo is faced with a task, there are astronauts trapped in space and they only have seven hours of life yet. Its up to Robo and his crew to think of a way to save them, build and create that thought, then hope they can enact it all in time to save the lives of those astronauts.
Holy crap!
Seeing Robo’s think tank come up with an idea, and seeing so much thought inside a comic was exciting. Yes, that’s the perfect word. I was excited to read this comic. Every page kept me interested, every bit of text had me entranced. I was at home while reading this, constantly turning to my honey and saying, “listen to this!”
I don’t even know if any of the science and ideas inside this issue could actually happen under our current knowledge of physics, but it doesn’t matter. While reading the book, I believed in every single thing that was being said. I believed that this science would work, I believed that this mission would succeed. Hell, I believed in this ridiculously smart robot adventurer.
The book is so good that I had to own the rest of this limited series, and Brian Clevinger was nice enough to send me an advanced copy of issue 5 to review.
Prepare for Atomic Robo night!
Heath Slater vs. Derrick Bateman. Slater wins.
Percy Watson vs. Darren Young. Titus O’Neil joins for commentary. Percy wins the match.
Tyson Kidd vs. Trent Barretta. Tyson wins.
Maxine vs. Kaitlyn. Maxine wins.
Its double-time DOOMED as the boys take a look at all the latest in news that proves humanity is on a fast snowboard down the slopes of Mt. Hell. This week, we’ve got a rug that makes you sick (and we don’t mean a toupee). We’ve got a man who led police on a long car chase for his own amusement, and ours! We’ve got a woman who finds her fast food electrifying. Plus, two Canadian cops explain why a Turkish morgue needs to install motion detectors. Oh, and Sax Carr goes on a little rant about Superbowl food. All this and Tim Powers on the internet’s most schadenfreude-ist show! Fun stuff… if your DOOOMED!
Wanna share the news? www.NewsOfTheDoomed.com now goes right to all the TIRH action you can handle! But stay tuned to CraveOnline for all the other goodies and fresh hot “This is REALLY Happening” every Tuesday! Plus a “This is REALLY Happening: Period!” every month or so. Oh yeah! Doomed to the MAX!
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The column was missing last week. I wasn’t home to write it up, sorry for all of you that were looking forward to it. Lets look at the cool new stuff coming out today and then in a little bit I’ll write up last week’s releases for the hell of it. Now to get right into those spinning discs that are taking up space on all our shelves.
Can someone tell me what the big deal is with Downton Abbey? Season 2 is out today and I still have yet to watch a minute of it. I actually un-followed Patton Oswalt because I couldn’t deal with reading any more about it. But I say that as someone who knows nothing of it. I could have been excited to hear about it if I was a fan of it. If anyone writes in with a glowing recommendation I will immediately start watching season one.
The Phantom of the Opera at the Royal Albert Hall. My mom ordered this and somehow it showed up early. She loved every minute of it and has already watched it multiple times. If you enjoy theater, or need to buy something for someone who does, this is a great new disc to pick up.
Harold and Kumar Christmas. I don’t actually care, but the fiance is a huge Neil Patrick Harris fan so I know we’ll sit through this movie eventually. See also: Beastly.
Hawaii Five-O Season one, featuring a lot of people you liked in other scifi/geeky shows. But this show isn’t geeky itself. Just geeky casting. Make up your minds show runners! Which genre do you want?! I need to know so then I can decide whether or not I want to watch this show once and for all.
Quentin Tarantino directed an episode of CSI. I haven’t watched CSI in at least 4 years if not longer. Is there any reason to care about this episode? And where is the single episode DVD of the Rob Zombie directed one?
Poolboy: Drowning Out the Fury looks to be one of the worst movies I’ve ever even heard of. It stars Danny Trejo, Kevin Sorbo and Jason Mewes. Machete, Hercules and Jay. There is not an ounce of possibility that this is a good movie. Not a fucking chance.
Rocko’s Modern Life Season Two! From Shout Factory! One of the greatest NickToons of all time now available to enjoy at home any time you like.
Check out some previews of this pick of the week as we close out this week’s column.
From our tag team partners at WRESTLING RECAPS!

Ring of Honor TV
Date: 2/4/2012
From: Baltimore, MD
The program starts off with a video highlighting a triple threat match between ROH Television Champion Jay Lethal, Mike Bennett and El Generico from Final Battle in December. Lethal retained the championship by pinning Bennett after hitting the Lethal Injection.
Kevin Kelly and Nigel McGuinness are standing in the ring to promote the show. Tonight, Jay Lethal will defend the ROH Television Championship against Mike Bennett. We hear comments from Mike Bennett and says that Lethal has no time limit and there isn’t a crooked referee. He believes he will be walking out as the champion.
Opening Contest: ROH Television Championship Match: No Time Limit
[champion] Jay Lethal vs. Mike Bennett
Former WWE Diva Maria is by Bennett’s side for this match. Bennett fakes Lethal out on a handshake and bails to the floor. Lethal hammers away on Bennett on the floor in the opening moments of the contest. Bennett bails to the floor to avoid a handspring attempt but Lethal chops him out there anyway. Lethal sends Bennett to the floor with a hurricanrana and they both struggle to get to their feet. Lethal punches Bob Evans and Bennett uses Maria as a shield, just like at Final Battle. Bennett punches Lethal with a right hand to gain the cheap advantage. We go to commercial as Bennett has control of the champion on the floor.
Back from the break, Lethal hits a spin kick to regain control of the bout. Lethal knocks Bennett off the apron with a springboard dropkick off the apron. Bennett catches Lethal on a suicide dive attempt and slams Lethal into the guard railing. Bennett controls Lethal with a chin lock. They begin to trade right hands in the middle of the ring with Lethal getting the better of the exchange. Lethal connects with a middle rope moonsault and a springboard dropkick for a two count. Lethal super kicks Bennett but is met with a neck breaker by Bennett to counter the Lethal Injection for a near fall! Lethal nearly rolls Bennett up for the a three count. Maria shoves Bennett off the ropes onto Lethal who counters a pin attempt after colliding with Bennett and wins the match!
Your Winner and STILL ROH Television Champion: Jay Lethal via pin fall
Match Rating: **1/2
Backstage, Eddie Edwards is interviewed by Veda Scott. Edwards thinks that Kyle O’Reilly has a man crush on Davey Richards. Edwards is cut off by Kyle O’Reilly who wants Edwards to say whatever he needs to say to his face. O’Reilly wants to wrestle Edwards. Edwards says he has a match for next week. They need to upgrade on their microphones, by the way.
We see footage form Final Battle where Kevin Steen got his job back after beating Steve Corino.
Kevin Kelly calls out Kevin Steen for an interview in the ring. Steen yanks the microphone away from Kelly and says he finally has the chance to speak his mind after a year. Steen hands Kelly his gum before telling him to leave the ring. Steen says he has been asking himself a question. How can ROH keep him home for a year? How can ROH claim to be the top promotion when their best wrestler isn’t there? Steen thinks he was kept at home because he wouldn’t suck up to Jim Cornette. Steen is going to face the end of the world as the ROH World Champion. When he gets his shot he will rip Davey Richards apart. Jim Cornette comes out with some security guards and Cary Silkin. Steen laughs at Cornette saying that Cornette spent his career waving a tennis racket, though he looks like he hasn’t played a sport in his life. Cornette knows that Kevin Steen isn’t sorry for what he did at Final Battle. Cornette announces that the package pile driver is banned from ROH. Steen swears he will come up with something to foil Cornette’s plan. Steen promises to take Richards apart and win the ROH World Championship.
Inside ROH this week consists of the House of Truth pointing the finger at the Briscoe Brothers for losing the eight man tag match. Roderick Strong says they are going to have a chance to shut the Briscoe’s up and win the tag titles. We hear from the Briscoe Brothers who say that it was Strong and Elgin who blew the match. These two teams will meet in a match with a $5,000 bet. Kelly announces that Richards will defend the ROH World Championship against ROH Television Champion Jay Lethal. Richards says he is the best in the world because he has the ROH World Championship. We also hear from the All Night Express. King talks about how Final Battle saw everything crash and burn. Rhett Titus will be back sooner than four months. King promises that the Young Bucks will go to the emergency room next time they meet.
Backstage, Veda Scott interviews the Young Bucks. They will be meeting the Briscoe Brothers at ROH 10th Anniversary show. They aren’t impressed with Haas and Benjamin calling them losers. The tag titles will be coming from a chicken ranch to beautiful California.
Charlie Haas says that they aren’t going to wrestle the Bravado Brothers this week. They are going to do an interview even though Steen went long with his and theirs was cut short. Benjamin is mad that the fans feel the same way that NYC felt about what they did to the Briscoe Brothers at Final Battle. Benjamin says that anyone who cheers for the Briscoe Brothers are stupid. They are holding the show hostage until they get the Briscoe Brothers. Jim Cornette comes out again with several referees. He says they don’t have time for this. The fans want the rematch to happen. The Briscoe Brothers come out after a commercial and they have a brawl with Benjamin and Haas. This is actually a match!
Main Event: ROH World Tag Team Championship Match
Wrestling’s Greatest Tag Team vs. [champions] Briscoe Brothers
Jay has Haas in the ring as the match legally starts. Haas kicks Jay in the corner but Jay fights back only for Benjamin to kick him in the face from the apron. Haas covers but only gets a two count on the cover. Benjamin stomps away on Jay in the corner to keep control of this title match. Benjamin sends Jay shoulder first into the ring post. Haas comes off the middle rope with a double axe handle and gets a two count after a snap suplex. Jay hammers away on Benjamin to make a comeback and blocks a splash in the corner with his knees!
Mark and Haas are tagged in. Mark hits a springboard cross body from the apron for a two count. Mark kicks Haas in the head and hits a straight jacket slam off the top, which looked to be messed up. Benjamin has a chair on the floor and Mark is hit in the head after Haas kicked Mark into the ropes! The referee saw that and this is over.
Your Winners and STILL ROH World Tag Team Champions: Briscoe Brothers via disqualification
Match Rating: *1/2
Final Thoughts:
I actually think this is the first bad show for ROH since they have gotten the television deal on Sinclair. The opener wasn’t anything all that great, and the main event was rather short and uneventful. The only positive from the show was Kevin Steen’s segment with Jim Cornette. I’m giving this episode a thumbs down.
Thanks for reading.
It’s February 6th and you know what that means: He’s Back! The Unfamous Chris show is fucking back and funnier than ever! Gay Merv, some gay bacon strips rapped in Twinkies! Also included is a hilarious interview with Josh Rimer! The teasing is over, and now it’s time for THE UNFAMOUS CHRIS SHOW!!!
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Wrestling Recaps – Reliving A Title Run #5: JBL As WWE Champion In ’04 – ’05.
From the Cabinet at WRESTLING RECAPS.
After years of being one-half of the tag team known as the APA, Bradshaw suddenly changed his attitude after his longtime partner and friend Faarooq was fired by then Smackdown General Manager Paul Heyman. Bradshaw would soon change his name to John Bradshaw Layfield and embraced his wall street attitude to a higher level. He felt that he was better than everyone and wasn’t discreet about how much money he made. Two months after his attitude change, the previously midcard level talent wrestler, JBL found himself in the main event scene challenging Eddie Guerrero.
They originally had a match at Judgment Day on May 16th, 2004. Prior to the event, JBL made things really personal between himself and Eddie. At a live event JBL confronted Guerrero when he was celebrating with his family. In one of the more shocking moments in WWE history, JBL caused Eddie’s mother to suffer from a heart attack. Going into the pay per view, JBL had promised to walk out the champion. JBL would win the match at Judgment Day, but only by disqualification. It ended up just being a matter of time before he would win the gold, though.
The next month they would meet at the Great American Bash. There feud was still red hot as their issues continued to become more and more personal. JBL was given the chance to pick the stipulation for the match by the new General Manager of Smackdown, Kurt Angle. JBL ended up choosing a Texas Bullrope match. Naturally both JBL and Guerrero bled quite a bit throughout the match. This time around, JBL was able to fulfill his destiny and won his first WWE Championship.
Two weeks later on Smackdown, Eddie Guerrero would get a rematch against JBL inside a steel cage.
Guerrero wasn’t able to regain the championship due to Kurt Angle screwing him over. JBL escaped the cage and retained he precious championship. It didn’t take long for a new challenger to step up, though. The next week on Smackdown, the Undertaker made it very clear that he wanted JBL at SummerSlam. However, the champion wasn’t too interested in that challenge.
On the August 5th edition of Smackdown, JBL mocked the Undertaker by calling out a midget dressed liked the Undertaker. This obviously didn’t sit well with the Undertaker. There was a brief scuffle but JBL was saved by Orlando Jordan. The next week, Jordan had a match with the Undertaker but JBL got involved to cause the DQ. JBL wasn’t able to keep the Undertaker down with the Clothesline From Hell and it was clear the champion was afraid of the Undertaker.
At SummerSlam, JBL escaped the gold yet again, but lost to the Undertaker by disqualification. You wouldn’t have realized that JBL was the winner, though. Taker had bloody the champion and ended up choke slamming JBL through his limo. The issues between JBL and the Undertaker weren’t over. On the next Smackdown, JBL declared that the Undertaker was evil and he would never get a rematch against him.
Undertaker wrestled Orlando Jordan on Smackdown again but this time if he won he would win the WWE Championship. Once again, JBL got involved to cause a disqualification. Teddy Long, the new General Manager of Smackdown booked JBL in a Last Rites match against the Undertaker at No Mercy. In a blast from the past, JBL brought back Gangrel and Viscera to attack the Undertaker. The Undertaker took care of his former alliance members from the late 1990′s in a handicap match on September 23rd.
At No Mercy, the Undertaker was moments away from putting JBL in the hearse to regain the championship. However, the deranged Heidenreich appeared and helped JBL retain the championship. JBL got past perhaps his toughest challenger on the Smackdown brand. Who could possibly stop JBL?
After No Mercy, JBL had a short program with Hardcore Holly. After Holly beat JBL by count-out, they competed in a hardcore match on Smackdown in England. JBL predictably retained the championship after hitting ring steps into Holly’s face.
On the October 21st edition of Smackdown JBL was turned on by Booker T who had given the impression to JBL that he was going to help him win a six man tag match. Booker T shocked JBL by pinning him in the ring. This would lead to Booker T becoming he new number one contender for the WWE Championship. JBL discredited the win by Booker saying that Booker was a good tag team wrestler, but JBL was better as a singles wrestler.
Booker continued to embarrass JBL and Orlando Jordan leading into their Survivor Series title match. On November 4th, Booker T teamed with announcer Josh Matthews to beat JBL and Orlando Jordan in a tag match. Matthews had grown tired of being assaulted by JBL and that led to a match between them. Booker clearly had the number of JBL.
At Survivor Series, Booker T came incredibly close to winning the WWE Championship, but Orlando Jordan distracted Booker T to allow JBL to hit him with the championship and was able to retain the championship in a hard fight contest. As long as Jordan is by his side, JBL is able to retain his championship it seemed like.
On the November 18th edition of Smackdown, Teddy Long announced that JBL would defend his WWE Championship against the three men he has previously competed against. Yes, he would defend against Booker T, Eddie Guerrero and the Undertaker at Armageddon! There was no way JBL was walking out with the gold, right?
In the weeks leading up to the match, JBL hired the Basham Brothers to his team to beat Booker T and Eddie Guerrero in a tag match. It would appear that JBL realized he needed to beef up his team in order to hang onto his precious championship.
The Smackdown before Armageddon saw JBL continue to be at a disadvantage. Teddy Long revealed that JBL wouldn’t be allowed to have any of his members at ringside for the title defense. Also, later that night he teamed with the Basham Brothers and Orlando Jordan in a handicap tag match against all three challengers for his championship. JBL’s team was on the losing side yet again.
At Armageddon, JBL was able to find a way to walk out with the WWE Championship. Heidenreich made another appearance to screw over the Undertaker again, which greatly helped JBL. JBL ended up hitting the Clothesline From Hell on Booker T to prevail.
JBL had a celebrating ceremony on the next Smackdown, but it was broken up by his former friend, Kurt Angle. Angle believed that he was the greatest WWE Champion of all-time and not JBL! They had a match, which ended in a disqualification when Big Show came out and cleaned house. So, now both Angle and Show are in the hunt for the WWE Championship.
Two weeks later on December 30th, JBL rigged a drawing for a challenger for his championship. He had a short match against Shannon Moore, but it was revealed that every piece of paper in the drawing had his name on it! So, Long booked JBL into a triple threat match against Kurt Angle and the Big Show at the Royal Rumble!
On the January 6th edition of Smackdown, Kurt Angle was tricked into thinking he was going to hookup with Amy Weber. Instead, he found himself in a shower with Joy Giovanni, who was a special friend of the Big Show. So, when the Big Show found out what happened, he chased Angle and attacked him, Mark Jindrak and Luther Reigns. It was revealed that this was JBL’s master plan.
The following week, Kurt Angle got in on the mind games by having Joy Giovanni trapped in JBL’s trunk and made it appear that JBL had done it. Once again, Big Show took out JBL and his buddies as the build for the Royal Rumble continued. Despite what they had been doing to each other, JBL and Angle formed an alliance to take Big Show out on the following episode of Smackdown. They brutally beat Big Show down and left him bloody. On the last Smackdown before the Royal Rumble, Teddy Long booked JBL in a Last Man Standing match against Kurt Angle. They beat the crap out of each other and it ended in a draw. It was revealed that the Big Show suggested the match between Angle and JBL to take place and now believed he would win the championship at the Royal Rumble!
Do you think that JBL’s luck would run out? If this title reign was proven anything, it’s that JBL always finds a way to retain the gold. That trend continued when after the Cabinet interfered and Angle’s buddies got involved, JBL hit Angle with the Clothesline From Hell to continue his unlikely long title reign on the Smackdown brand.
Teddy Long booked JBL in a barbed wire steel cage match for No Way Out against the Big Show. JBL tried to find a way to prevent the match from happening and ended up acquiring a tranquilizer gun. JBL attempted to attack Big Show on February 10th edition of Smackdown, but that backfired on the champion.
The barbed wire steel cage match was the main event for No Way Out. Now, there was no way for JBL to find a way past Big Show inside a cage with barbed wire surrounding the top of the cage, right? Think again, folks. These two had a bloody match which saw Show choke slam JBL off the top rope and the canvas broke as a result. Show attempted to leave through the door, which was locked. He broke the lock, but JBL prevailed by crawling under the ring and touched the floor to miraculously retain the championship.
With John Cena becoming the new number one contender at No Way Out, JBL had another challenge to face. These two were set to compete at WrestleMania, but that was over a month away. JBL and his Cabinet got a big advantage over Cena when JBL cost Cena the WWE United States Championship by hitting him with the WWE Championship. Orlando Jordan was then able to pick up the win and the title. The following week, JBL destroyed the spinner US Championship and brought back the old one.
JBL tired to get Teddy Long to suspend John Cena for hitting the FU on the General Manger. Instead, Long said that Cena will lose his shot at the title if he puts his hands on JBL outside of a wrestling ring. JBL tried his hardest to get Cena to strike him, but wasn’t successful in getting that to happen.
On the March 24th edition of Smackdown, JBL had a debate with John Cena. The segment saw Cena damage JBL’s limousine by popping a tire and spray painting “JBL sucks” on the limo. JBL was obviously pissed off, but assured Cena he would crush his dreams at Mania. Cena continued to get under JBL’s skin by dumping water into his hat, painting a yellow streak on the champ’s back and painting FU on the front of JBL’s shirt!
The final Smackdown before WrestleMania saw JBL get Cena arrested for what he did last week and ended up kicking Cena in the groin because Cena made a move towards him while in handcuffs. The time has come for these two to meet at WrestleMania. JBL’s WWE Championship reign, which no one expected, comes to an end when John Cena pins him after hitting the FU. JBL was champion for 280 days. And so begins the era of John Cena, folks.
Tagged Armageddon, Basham Brothers, Big Show, Booker T, Eddie Guerrero, Great American Bash, Heidenreich, JBL, John Cena, Judgment Day, Kurt Angle, No Mercy, No Way Out, Orlando Jordan, Paul Heyman, Royal Rumble, Smackdown, SummerSlam, Teddy Long, Undertaker, WrestleMania XXI, WWE |