I am BAAAAAACK.  Y’all missed me, right? Well thank you for your patience as I moved 3 hours away from my former location to attend graduate school for my MFA in Painting & Drawing (and had to replace my laptop, RIP Frankenlappy), and I beg for your forgiveness if I disappear again due to studio demands.

Now, even though I was gone I still have a few blogs planned out to post, but here is one that couldn’t wait.  At my new place I don’t have cable, and due to the hilly area neither do I have ability to get anything with bunny ear antennas.  Even when tin foil is added.  What is the world coming to?!  Anyways, I have been patiently waiting to catch up on some shows that I religiously watch, one of those being “Project Runway”.

PR is one of my guilty pleasure shows.  Add fashion, creativity, time crunches, and a bunch of bitchy drama queens, and you have me from the words “Make it Work”.  I have been a faithful viewer for the full ten seasons, but this last weeks episode pissed me off more then when crappy designer Gretchen won over Mondo a few seasons ago.

What made you mad, might you ask?  Ven.  Ven and his bitching about having to dress a “plus size woman”.  Fashion is something I enjoy (not that you would know that by my ‘sweatpants’ drawer, ha), I see high fashion especially as a combination of theater and art.  If you’re not fully aware in general fashion models, especially runway models tend to be very tall and very thin. In fact, when designers sketch their figures are on average ten heads tall (take the length of the head from the highest point to the lowest–usually the chin and that is one length.  Measure along the body) while the actual human is generally around 7 or 7.5 heads tall.  In addition, many of these women are actually girls, often prepubescent as to achieve that rain thin frame before the puberty fairy comes and gives her boobs, hips, and cellulite. High heels help elongate their slender forms to achieve the sketches.  In general WE KNOW THIS, and that is why I get really excited when PR does a “Everyday Woman” challenge.  It celebrates that there is more then just one body type out there, one beauty ideal, and that EVERY SINGLE WOMAN deserves to feel beautiful no matter if they’re a size 2 or 22, petite, tall, round, pear, curvy, slim, bootylicious, and much more.

Now, Ven is a designer I have enjoyed so far in PR this season.  He has great fabric manipulation and construction.   In this weeks episode he was a whiny bitch.  And if I had a trophy for “Asshole of the Week” he would get it.  And probably I would hit him up side the head with it.  You see, his model Terri, his every woman (who was brought there by her friend who thought she deserved pampering as mother of 4 who drove 4 hours a day for work while her husband was a stay at home dad) had the nerve to not only be a size 14 (GASP) but to also be…..OLD–she is 40.

HOW DARE SHE INCONVENIECE HIM IN THIS WAY?  From the get-go he made her feel like shit, so much so by the end that she was making nasty comments to him (rightfully so) about her being fat.  I would like to take a moment here and say that she is a perfect representation of the average American woman, at a size 14.  The issue here is not about her size, weight, or proportions, but how ill equipped this designer was to deal with someone who wasn’t a super model.  In general fashion, “straight” sizes tend of be on the lower end of the size 0-6 scale, while 8 and up are more commonly considered “plus”.  Now, as absurd as I feel this sizing is, my real issue is this: why don’t designers create fashionable clothing for women of EVERY body type?  And it is not just a “fat” or “skinny” issue, it is also an issue of learning different proportions.  As a woman who is 5’11” and generally a size 16, I have very different needs then a lovely friend of mine who is 4’11” and a size 2.  Neither one of us is “better” then the other, we BOTH have issues with length of pants and fit of most clothing.  She shops in the kids section often and I have one hell of a time finding a store that sells honest to blog TALLS.  Not even straight size or plus, but just tall.  Lets not even jump into flattering cuts or fabrics right now.

Does not EVERY SINGLE WOMAN DESERVE to feel beautiful, fashionable, desirable?  As much as we would like to pretend it doesn’t, clothes go a long way to help achieve that feeling.  Whenever Ven opened his mouth he treated his client like a piece of dirt.  He actually said to Tim “My client doesn’t have a shape”.  Correction.  Your client doesn’t have a shape you are interested in learning how to dress.  Your inadequacies as a designer are at fault here, not the woman’s body.  Often he would point out to her that something “didn’t fit” and he couldn’t “find it in her size”, which is unacceptable.  You MAKE IT WORK, BITCH.  His objective was supposed to have been to make his woman feel beautiful and what he did was humiliate her.  He put her in a very unattractive frock (yes FROCK) of a shiny blue flowy top with wing like arms.  Shiny is not flattering on curvy women.  And on the bottom he had her in this odd high-waisted pencil skirt with a zipper that went from waist to hem that was upzipped to mid thigh.  It did nothing to celebrate her body, highlighting all of what she considered her flaws.  He blamed her for his design not looking good instead of blaming his vision.  His ignorance made her feel ugly, and for that he should have gone home.  Unfortunately he did not.

He bitched that it was “unfair” that he had a ‘plus’ model while the others had closer to straight size clients.  And to answer him I just say this: Shut the hell up, dude.  I wonder if he realizes that if he learns to dress various body types that his career not only would last longer, but he would probably make a helluva lot more money.  Probably not.

So, from every single solitary woman out there I give you a hearty “Fuck You”.

Ven’s design for the aforementioned challenge.

On the flip side, I would also like to give a proud shout out to Gunner who said this: “I want my dress to look just as good on a full figured woman as it would size 6…”  That is one designer who understands that all women have a right to feel beautiful.  Kudos.

Just as Heidi said, “Who here is not a REAL woman?”  We’re ALL REAL. Get used to it.  We’re not going anywhere.