Gratitude.

So… here I am unemployed again.  Well technically unemployed.  As in I do not have a job to go to anymore.  I have had numerous good interviews, I’m trying to write long gestating ideas, and eBay is a wonderful thing.  However, having experienced now three periods of unemployment in two years there is one word that comes to mind and one image that keeps popping up in my head.

That word is gratitude.

That image is this one:

Gratitude

For those of you who don’t know, that is one of the greatest wrestlers of a generation trying to gather up every bit of strength left in his body so he doesn’t collapse into a puddle on the floor.  And that is his wife beside him transferring everything within herself into his soul.

Thank God I have someone like that.

The worst time between jobs lasted almost a year.  Not once, not once did my wife give me any grief or waver or do anything that showed other than absolute eternal love.  It was amazing.

See, if you don’t know this about Western culture then I hate to be the one to break it to you, but society expects the man to be in charge.  I am the one to get a job, make money, sacrifice all time outside of the home while she is the one to raise children and cook and clean and all that stuff.  We have never been like that but I didn’t realize how much our home is a council and not a dictatorship.

I cant find work, so she did.  She’s not here (because she’s now working) so I try to keep everything neat and tidy at home.  She cooks dinner because I’m horrible at doing it.  But I did the dishes after!

Today we were laying in bed, debating taking a nap while the kid took his.  Here I am, unwashed, losing my hair, losing work.  I can tell her every member of the Avengers but I cant tell her why the car makes that noise.  I can tell her all the Days of Future Past but I cant tell her what tomorrow will bring.  And this woman was giving me the biggest smile and had an inner light in her eyes that radiated unconditional love for me.

I could be gypsy cursed to live forever and it still wouldn’t give me enough time to tell her how thankful I am that she married me.  While I am not perfect, and while life has given more downs than ups lately I know that as long as I’m with her tough times will never be permanent.

 

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